Skip to content

Stories
Tests

Test: Do You Have A Personality?

Test Results

Thank you for taking our test! However, you did very poorly!

You scored: 43%. That's terrible.

This means you should go into hiding, eat bacon and smoke cigarettes. This way you'll have fun AND die happy (and soon!). Thanks.

Back to Tests

People often wonder: am I likeable? Do people think I have a good personality? And, if I do have a “good personality,” does that mean they think I’m unattractive? If you wonder, that, take this test, and find out for yourself!

Of the following, which is most likely to be found in the trunk of your car:

Drugs.
An emergency survival kit, including jumper cables, a blanket and a radio.
A jack and a spare tire.
Your self-esteem.

Donald Trump, Mike Pence, and Hillary Clinton are on a sinking boat. Who gets saved?

Donald, because he's the president and therefore most important person on the boat.
Mike, because many people hope he would be a more stable president
Hillary, because Donald still wants her investigated.
The Nation.

In your opinion, the most glaring oxymoron in the American English language is:

Act Naturally
Good Grief
Business Ethics
Peace Force
English Fashion

You are so dumb that:

You sold your car for gas money
You sold your television to pay for cable
You sold your hair to buy shampoo
You sold your computer to pay your Internet Provider

You are having bad dreams that you are an engineer because:

you stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE.
your wrist watch has more computing power than an Intel Core i7-6850k.
you know what an Intel Core i7-6850k is.
your spouse asks Siri or Alexa to send you an e-mail that triggers a text to inform your pager, instead of calling you to dinner.

You are currently writing your 'no less than 5,000 word' term paper, due at the end of this semester. In the paper you plan to:

Prove that Superman would be no match for Beowulf
Quote your VCR user's manual to support various military dictorial theories
Explain what a VCR is
Paste 5 photos of your dog. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words, right?
Insert a recipe for pea soup in the middle of the paper, to see if the professor notices

What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand?

A bunch of barrister heads on a beach.
Not sex on the beach, but someone is likely to get screwed.
A golden opportunity to try out your new sling-shot.
Not enough sand.

You and your two best friends find a lamp, rub it and get a Genie, who gives you each one wish. Friend 1 wishes to be in Hawaii, and boom, off he goes. Friend 2 wishes to be in Florida and off she goes. You miss your friends, so you wish:

To also go to Hawaii
To also go to Florida
For new friends, to replace those two
That they'd both come back to you

Post navigation

Previous There Was This Big Fight The Other Night

NextTest: Tell Your Friends Your Darkest Secrets?

Mockumentary, 2002-2020, is a part of The Hans://Anderson Corporation.